Even when we don't mean to, we slight the people we love. I am in deep trouble for offering a mutual friend my husband's help when he was in bed. He doesn't like to be told what to do. Who does? He just wanted to be asked instead of relied upon.
Here's the bad part: I wouldn't have relied on him, neither would my friend have, had he proven in the past not to be so reliable. I was planning on asking him, but I have gotten so forgetful lately. He says he is the last one in the family to ever know what is going on or is planned. That could be true sometimes, but not always.
Okay, so I will accept responsibility for making my long-time hubby upset. However, I will not put up with his behavior of trying to make me feel bad when he knew about the favor my friend (who is also his friend) needed this weekend. He was asked and he said yes. If he didn't want to help after all, just say that and leave it at that. No problems. The problems arise when he takes no responsibility for his own choices and makes me or my friend be responsible for his choices. No one, not even me, can make hubby do what hubby doesn't want to do.
This is time for a change, dear. This behavior is old and obnoxious and so like your father or your brother. CUT IT OUT!!! It is not endearing or cute. Just because I tell you I think your ass is cute, does not make it okay to act like an ass!
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